Monthly Archives: May 2013

Minor Roadblock

Over the last two days I’ve really struggled. On some Sundays, I start work at 7am and need to be up before 6am to make the drive there. It kills me. I hate early mornings, winters in Morpeth are friggen cold and I like sleeping in with my partner. 

So after a double shift yesterday I was hungry, tired and cranky. This is a dangerous combination for me. I become a mindless beast, eating anything to satisfy my need. Usually this will be anything from toasted sandwich’s to pies to hot chips. You name it. As long as it filled the void.

Thus resulted a huge internal battle within myself. I love the work I’ve done so far, what I’ve achieved, what I have yet to achieve. And there was all consuming boredom, exhaustion and hunger.

So I went to bed. I had a light dinner, I got off my butt and JFDI, and made some dinner. Then hit the sack. This is an old trick of mine. Everything is always better in the morning. And naturally it was!

So tonight, I revisited the My Mission page on 12WBT, my excuses and their solutions, and of course the earlier posts of this blog. I wanted to reconnect with myself from 3 weeks ago. Tap into my enthusiasm, my dedication and commitment. I wanted to reaffirm my promise with myself and Michelle and make it clear to myself the reasons why I am here on this journey. Today’s mantra was this;

Anything worth achieving, is not going to be easy!

And whoever said that is true. And as my buddy said today. It doesn’t get easier, you get better!

Week 2

Today was weigh in for week 2. So far I have lost 5.4kg since my pre-season. I am absolutely thrilled with how I am going. My decision to do this is the best I’ve made in a long time. I have more energy, I am sleeping better, I am happier, more confident and I love that I love exercise. 

I am enjoying the gym and learning to run, and get sad when I can’t make it to the gym. I am loving the food in the plan. All my recipes have turned out fantastic and I am trying new things, like lentils, which I never would have eaten before, or drinking tea, which I never did. Now I drink peppermint tea and am trying new ones all the time.

I look forward to doing parkruns. I registered for the local parkrun in Newcastle and I can’t wait to give that a go. Every single person in my life, who is important, has been nothing but supportive and enabling me in my goals. My #D30 girls are amazing, my buddy is a machine and an inspiration himself. 

I had forgotten how addictive it is, watching the numbers go down each week. I have done this before, so I know I can do it again, I won’t be seeing a plus on those scales if I can help it for a long time!

My First Fist Pump Moment

Today while doing the 2nd workout of my learn to run app, I found that the running was easier, I wasn’t sweating like a whore in church, and that I could actually achieve this. While running I thought to myself, “I can do this, I’m learning to run!”

I have never had this feeling in my entire life. I am so happy I am on this path now and that it is coming so naturally to me, as if I had it in me all along. I only had to chose to do it. 

I am proudly telling anyone and everyone who will listen I am training with 12WBT, how well I am doing and that I love it. I am discovering my new identity as a fit and healthy individual,  and as a runner!

Today was also weigh in day for the first week, and I have managed 1.7kg since Monday with a total of 3.7kg in a week and a half. I am absolutely stoked. I just can’t weight till I can feel the difference. 

Look out world, I am a runner!

Day 1

Today was an absolute blast. It was a great start to the Round. Woke up at sparrow fart and did my first day of learn to run with an app on my phone. However it was colder than Hades out there and so much fog! My shoes got soaked from the dew on the grass and I’m sure I took more of the cricket field home on my shoes than what was on the pitch. 

I burned through my recommended calorie burn with that exercise. Did that stop me? NO! For a couple of hours I rolled around in my blanket trying desperately to get warm then before 12 ducked over the gym and did a Balance class. Burned another 544cal. 

Now I am at work, I am exhausted (partially from an early start this morning, but mostly from a long and early day at work yesterday morning), but I am happy. 

It’s all one day at time here. But I am ready. 

Mini Milestones

So our Sentient Being Up Above – Nina Monger, has set yet another task for us to complete as Buddies in the #D30 group. Share with your buddy your Mini Milestone at Week 4 and when your buddy achieves it, post it up and boast.

I hadn’t even thought of goals for my mini milestones. During pre-season we were asked by Michelle to set our Short-term and long-term goals, so 1 month, 3 months, 6 months so on and so forth. But I totally forgot about our 4 weekly Mini Milestones.

So what do I want to achieve at each interval within the Round. 

Well for Week 4, I will complete 20 classes at the gym – by the end of may) and receive my Gym Groupie Singlet. I thought it was a neat little way to incorporate a goal and a promotion that is running at the gym at the moment, and have proof at the end to show off!

Week 8.
I want to have completed the Zombie Run 5k Training App that I have on my phone. I found this app a while back and thought it was the coolest thing on the planet. I get to mix together learning to run 5k along with zombies! So you get to be chased by zombies and it has a whole simulated scenario and everything. While you’re out running you collect weapons, med kits, ammo etc while being chased by zombie hordes. This will all be in preparation to the Zombie Running app. 

Week 12.
While I have yet to think of a goal for this milestone I know it will be epic. I want it to truly reflect my journey, how far I’ve come, what I want to achieve and for it to represent something very important to me. So when I think of it, be sure to look back here because it will be phenomenal. 

The Day Before.

So today is the day before Day 1, Round 2 2013. 

My meals are cooked. My diary is organised. My people are aware and supportive. I only have a few items left on my list to get this afternoon and I just have to finish my Pre-Season Fitness task this evening at home.

Mum has been so supportive. Helping me cook my main meals last night. She has worried about my weight for a long time, but recently I have put on 10kg in a few months after moving in with my partner and it has been stressing her more. Understandably. 

I have done my commitment, finished my mindset tasks set in the Pre-season. My mind, body and soul are ready. I’ve become focused and I am so happy to see the numbers go down already! 2.5kgs gone in the last week or so. I know I am strong enough. My habits are changing and I’m excited to begin. 

I will be on here every day in the first week, I want to chronicle my journey in depth, so when I finish, I can look back and see what I had to come through and how I developed as a person to get there. 

I’m looking forward to living again. 

Rethinking Decisions

One of my problems is hunger. When it grabs hold it hits me hard. Nausea, sweats,  headache. It’s awful. But it’s no longer an excuse. I have solutions for all my excuses. I will be so organised I will always have something near that is a 12wbt acceptable snack. 

Yesterday i had a momentary slip. I drove through KFC. In my autopilot mode I consumed some chips and a wing then though, what the heck am I doing. I’ve done so well to cut that out and I’m going backwards. So I put it down and threw it away. I was so happy I was able to think about the what I was doing. I have never had the ability to do that. I just consume and regret later. 

I like the changes I’m making and discovering my new identity as a person who is mindful as opposed to mind-full. 

In the face of adversity

Thinking track of last year when I tried to give 12wbt a go, all I can remember is that I was scared. Scared that I’d be hungry all the time, which for me is close to death, scared I would fail etc.

This round I am nothing but excited. I keep telling my partner all the things we could do together and all the things I want to do and achieve and I think my enthusiasm is rubbing off onto him too as he was telling me he wants to make time to come to the gym with me. So I told him 6:30 Friday morning we should go to boxing together.

I love my excitement and I’m going to bottle it up and keep it for as long as I can.

A few days ago my car died on the side of the road on my way home from work. Normally this would have been the absolute end of the world, I would have eaten my stress and frustration. But I carried on. I still went and signed up at the gym, I still went to work. I JFDI! It may be small things but the old me would have curled into a ball and given up. I didn’t get want to do that any more.  I’ve been organising my little button off. I’ve made sure there is room in the budget for any expenses to get the car working again. This may mean not getting my workout gear for a while. But I’m alright with that. I’m learning to be flexible.

Goals

I feel, deep down inside of me, that I am a runner. I feel that I was born a runner, but have forgotten how to run. I will learn how to run again.

I have gotten on the wide world of the web and searched some Fun runs/obstacle courses for me to work towards and placed them in my diary. 

I have put down the Colour Run in Sydney. I got a bit envious of the colourful people doing the Newcastle one today and thought that I must get in on this fun. That one is 5km. So I want to run 5km by the end of August non-stop. 

I have put down the Raw Challenge which is at the end of the September which is 6km and has obstacles. 

And finally at the end of November is the Mud Run. A 7km obstacle course. 

My super ultimate goal is the Tough Mudder in 2014. 18-20km obstacle course. It is a tough run and looking at it, I’m only excited!

Round 2

So this quite literally is round 2 for me! Or take 2. I joined again a few nights ago on a spur of the moment, “I’m sick of this shit”, decision. 

Best decision ever. 

I sit here at work, 9 days before kickoff, savagely tired, but extremely excited. I am ready. I have mingling more and more with my #D30 gals, pumping myself up more and more for the  start. I cannot weight. (lolgetit?) xD.

I am joining a new gym and have got the timetable for that, I have gotten the timetable for aqua aerobics, and I am blessed with a good job in that my work roster has been set (extra shifts come in all the time thought), I am in the middle of working out my diary. Organise and diarise. 

I want to take control of my life. I have felt in the last few months, a downward spiral of my mental state. I have felt a distinct lack of order and stability in my life, despite an apparent abundance of it. I have a roof over my head. A loving boyfriend who supports me in everything. A beautiful baby boy cat who I love with my entire being. A job that puts money in the bank and food on the table. But yet I feel like nothing is in my control. 

I have realised this is my own doing. I have the control at every moment, I make all the choices. Nothing is out of my control. So what Is going on! I have not been taking account of my choices and their consequences. 

Nothing is beyond my grasp. I decide what time I wake up, whether I go to the gym or not. I decide what goes in my mouth, no one else. I choose to spend my money on takeaway as opposed to groceries. I have had a moment of clarity whilst writing this blog and reading other #D30 blogs. I am the master of my own fate. And I will take the reins once more instead of just cruising along.

I will choose to eat better. I will choose to exercise more. I will choose to respect myself better and be more aware of the decisions I am making. I will make myself remember to keep my diary, and follow my plans to the letter. I will not let my emotions rule my day, or my plate. 

I want to make my family proud of me, to stop the doubters and to truly live. What I have been doing recently, has not been living. I breathe, I sleep and I eat, but I have not been conscious to the world around me, and that is simply not acceptable. 

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